Am I Worthless?
by Shizuka Shirakawa
Summary: In Queendom of Falena, a male royal family would never be able to inherit the throne. This fic is about the pressure others have caused to a very young prince. R&R one-shot


Author's note: ah it's been a long time since I published a new fic. I've been busy and all when suddenly I got an idea to write a new fic about Suiko V. well this is the second time I write a fic in English so I apologize if there's any grammar mistakes or misspelling. Oh yea in this story Faroush is 14 while little lymmie is 8. happy reading

Maybe it was a mistake to be born in this Queendom, especially as a member of the royal family. Born to be the prince of this Queendom wasn't a good fate, that's what Faroush ever thought in his life. Worthless was the right word given to males born within the royal family. They don't need a prince, they need a princess to become the next queen. Was his majesty Ferid worthless? No, he was an outsider who came to Falena and were able to win Queen Arshtat's heart through the sacred games. But what about the prince? Son of Commander Ferid and Queen Arshtat, born into the royal family as the first child of the couple. The day he was born wasn't a good news to everyone. The royal family, and the people were expecting a baby girl, not a baby boy. Many years passed as the prince grew up. No one acknowledged him. He was only respected due to his status as the Queen's son and a member of royal family. Not more than that. No matter how hard he did his best to prove himself to others through training he received from his father himself wasn't enough. Until his little sister was born.

That day the weather was not very pleasant, the 8 year old princess was wandering around the palace for almost an hour looking for her beloved brother with her personal bodyguard following her.

"Princess, please slow down. We've been running here and there for an hour or maybe more. How could you be so energetic!"

Despite her bodyguard's protests, the princess didn't slow down a bit, she even increased her pace. Miakis released a deep sigh. "Oh boy, I'm gonna lose weight in an instant this way."

"Faroush! Faroush, where are you? Let's play hide and seek together."

Her voice echoed within the halls of the palace. She didn't stop until she found a tall figure with long silver hair standing right in front of the Audience's chamber, not noticing his little sister right behind him. Until another shout startled him.

"Brother! Let's play together!" smiling widely, hoping her puppy eyes begging would effect him. True, the prince couldn't resist.

"But it's gonna rain outside, Lym. Surely you don't want to get wet and catch a cold don't you?"

"I don't care. I just wanna play with you. play play play play!"

"A-ah Princess, your brother's right. Besides you can play with him next time."

"But when is next time? He's always busy with diplomatic duties. Don't you understand that we hardly see each other, Miakis?" still using her puppy eyes to beg. The prince could only scratch the back of his head.

Suddenly Commander Ferid came out of the Audience chamber and saw three of them in surprise.

"Ah, Miakis, perfect timing. I'm holding an emergency meeting. Tell all available Queen's knights to gather in the Audience chamber within 10 minutes."

'_Emergency meeting? That has never been a good news._' Faroush thought.

"Yes sir!" with that Miakis went away, leaving Faroush and Lym with their father and did as she was ordered earlier.

"And Faroush, I want you to protect Lym for the time being. Do not leave the palace area until further notice. Is that understood?"

Both siblings said in unison "Yes, Father."

"But can I play with brother in the garden? Just an hour." Hearing that Ferid took a deep breath and with a little doubt in his mind he nodded his head.

"Alright, Lym. Just an hour. Faroush I want you to bring along a few guards with you too."

Lym ran outside with big smile on her face. Only the prince and his father were left alone in that room.

"Faroush, please keep a close watch on Lym. Protecting her and the Queen is our primary mission for now. I'm afraid….I'm afraid that the remaining members of Nether Gate are after us. That's why don't let your guard down even just a bit."

"Understood, sir!" with that, Faroush left to follow Lym.

The garden was very wide and beautiful, no wonder why Lym liked that place so much. The princess was wandering around the garden to collect any kinds of flowers for her mother. It was very cloudy, dark and started to rain.

"Lym, Let's go back."

"Yes brother!" she shouted back from afar. But before she could turn to face her brother, she heard screams coming from the guards. Scream of agony.

"Intruders!"

Half of the guards were killed mercilessly by 3 skilled assassins in a mere seconds. Faroush immediately ran to her sister, picked her up and brought her to safety with the remaining guards.

"Prince, they're Nether Gates! What should we do?"

The prince knew better than anyone among them that they didn't stand a chance fighting them. "Protect the princess with all your might! Leave the assassins to me! And I want one of you to go and tell the Commander!"

"Yes your majesty!"

The prince then looked upon his sister, he could see fear in her beautiful hazel eyes. He knew that she was in great danger and it was his duty to make sure the assassins didn't go any closer to his sister.

"Lym, stay here, okay?"

"Where are you going?! Don't leave me!"

"I'm gonna hold them back and buy some time. I promise I won't let them do any kind of harm to you."

Although Lym was just a little bit assured she nodded her head and watch her brother approached a group of assassins consist of 4 people. Faroush drew his tri-nunchaku, ready to fight. The wind began to blow hard and the rain got intense. At first he could deflect all of his opponent's attacks but he started losing concentration. He slammed the tip of his weapon on his enemy's head, knocking him out. Faroush noticed a shadow moving behind him with dagger in his hands ready to slay his head. Fortunately the prince could dodge in time and parry other attacks coming from the other assassin.

'_Damn I can't hold on any longer.'_

"Khe khe khe, the prince looks helpless. Well like everyone said, you're pathetic prince! Everyone abandoned you only because you're a male in the royal family. They're ashamed of you because you'll never be able to inherit the throne!" mumbled one of the assassins. Faroush didn't know which one, he kept his composure not to be effected by their taunts.

'_Don't listen to them Faroush' _

"You're just like us, abandoned! Unloved! Your people only love your sister."

"They didn't abandon me!"

"Then why the guards haven't come around? Heh, pathetic. I'll end your suffering now!" the assassins attacked in the same time, leaving Faroush off guard. The prince could only parried 2 of the assassins, the other one was successful in leaving a deep slash on his left side.

"Grrah.."

"Ouuh, so this is the royal blood. I wanna taste how sweet it is."

Faroush stepped back a few steps, clutching his bleeding side tightly, hoping it would stop the blood from flowing. He could see the assassins were about to attack him once again. He could only closed his eyes tightly, waiting for the final blow that would end his life.

'_It's okay, Lym is fine. You're not really that important, Faroush. Your death won't cause any trouble to your country.'_

But the final blow never came. When he opened his eyes, he saw all of the assassins were lying dead on the grass field with their blood pooling around their torn flesh. He then turned to see his father sheathing his sword.

"Are you okay, son? How is Lym?"

"I..I'm fine. Lym is safe with the guards."

Ferid then walked closer and kneeling right in front of his son to check the injuries he suffered. Faroush received some scratches all over his body fro the battle and only one deep wound on his side.

"You're bleeding, c'mon let's return to the palace and get your wounds treated." Faroush just nodded and followed his father.

The Queen was very anxious hearing the news from her husband. She immediately hugged Lym tightly as if she would never let go of her ever again and checking any injuries she may had got.

"Oh Lym, I'm glad you're okay. Oh."

Faroush only looked from afar, their parents were busy checking out on Lym when he noticed someone put her hand on the prince's shoulder.

"Prince, are you okay?" asked the dark haired girl. "You were spacing out."

"Oh, I'm fine Lyon. Ouch.." he clutched his side again. This sent an immediate response from his sworn protector and best friend to check on him.

"Prince, you're ble-"

"No,it's okay Lyon, just a scratch."

"A scratch won't bleed like that! Please allow me to treat your wounds, Prince." He knew it better than anyone else, once Lyon's very determined to do something, she will finish it. Releasing a deep sigh he just followed his bodyguard guiding him to his room.

"Prince, you were great!"

"Hmm? Why do you say that?"

Lyon put some medicine on his wounds when she suddenly could hear a low groan. "You fought those assassins on your own."

Faroush just frowned. "It was father who defeated them all."

The assassins words hit him again. Abandoned huh?

"Lyon, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, what is it, Prince?" she then wrapped the wound neatly.

" Am I ….really useless to everyone?"

"Prince, don't say that! If it wasn't because of your efforts today, the princess would have got hurt."

"But still-"

"No buts, Prince. Everyone loves you very much. Including…m-me." She stammered at the end of her sentence.

The prince just smiled at her, he put his hand on Lyon's right cheek, caressing the softness of her skin while she was blushing very hard. The door bursts open, revealing the Queen in fury.

"Faroush, I demand an explanation on how all of this could happen?!" She approached her son in an instant, demanding to hear a good explanation from his only son.

"I uh, Lym and I were-"

With one swift movement the Queen slapped him on his cheek.

"Don't you know how much danger you've put your sister into today? She could have been killed by Nether Gates! She's very important to this country, don't you know that?!"

Faroush was speechless, he could have refused his sister's begging and just stay with her within the castle's walls. No harm would befall her. It was all his fault.

"I'm sorry…your majesty."

"You disappoint me, Faroush."

The next morning was even harder for Faroush. He felt his body was so heavy to move around. He woke up in the morning with sore muscles all over his body. He could hear a faint knock on the door followed by a familiar voice.

"Prince, may I come in?"

"Enter."

Lyon stepped inside and walked to the side of his bed. "Good morning, Prince. The weather today is great. It'll be a nice day for training."

"Y-yeah."

"Prince, you look pale. Are you sick?" Lon was very concerned of his health. He looked very pale and…tired?

"I'll call a doctor for you."

"No!" he grabbed her hands immediately. "I'm fine, just lack of sleep."

"Are you really sure, Prince?"

"Yeah. Um, could you wait for me in the training room? I'll meet you there." His bodyguard could only obey.

Faroush sit on the side of his bed. He stood up for a few seconds then fell to his knees, coughing hardly. He put his hands to cover his mouth and was surprised to see the color that stained his hands. Red. He rose up immediately and looked over the standing mirror, he looked like a walking dead in daylight. Overwhelmed for a while, he then chose to ignore it, changed his clothes and head down to the training room.

Unfortunately, his conditions didn't get better, it got worse. His head was spinning around, vision blurry, and lack of energy. He couldn't concentrate on his training at all until Kyle pointed the tip of his sword right next to Faroush's neck.

"What's going on with you, Prince? You could have blocked my sword a few times but you didn't at all. And all of your movements…were you dancing, Prince?"

"Wha- I wasn't dancing, Kyle!"

"But you look horrible, Prince, as if you're about to collapse."

"I-I'm clearly fi- _*cough* *cough*_"

The concerned Kyle and Lyon approached the prince. He didn't stop coughing. Everyone was taken by surprise as the prince collapsed to the floor, his mouth and hands stained with red.

"PRINCE!" Lyon screamed out loud, catching the taller figure before he hit his head to the floor. "Prince, can you hear me? Answer me!" she stroked his cheek, wishing any kind of movement made by the prince.

"Kyle, call a doctor immediately!"

That was the last conversation Faroush heard before he was consumed with his own darkness.

Lyon was waiting outside of the prince's room. She was lost in her own thoughts about how could she failed to notice the prince's strange behavior this morning. 5 minutes after the prince's collapse the doctor came and ordered Kyle to carry the unconscious Faroush to his room immediately. After that Kyle went to the Queen's chamber to inform this news to the Commander and the Queen. She could hear some rush steps from afar that belonged to the Queen, the Commander, The princess and Miakis echoing through the hall. Looking at the blood on Lyon's armor, Queen Arshtat freaked out.

"What happened? Please tell us he's okay, Lyon."

"I'm sorry, but I don't know, your majesty." Lyon fought hard against the tears that were about to fall down her cheeks. Not long after that the door opened. Both the Queen and Ferid questioned the doctor immediately as if there's no time to spare.

"How's he, doctor?"

"I'm sorry to tell you this, Your majesty. I just…find out that the royal highness the prince was poisoned."

The air surrounding them became heavier and heavier. No one dared to speak a word except for Ferid.

"What kind of poison did he suffer?"

"It's hard to tell your majesty, but I know for sure it came from a poisoned weapon."

Ferid took a stern look on his face. "So it came from the wounds he got yesterday."

"Yes, it almost cost him his life. If sir Kyle were late 5 more minutes, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to save his life."

Ferid was silent. He felt guilty for not worrying about his son yesterday. He was too focused on Lym. The same thing hit Queen Arshtat. She felt terrible. She was so raged that she didn't even ask on how his son could have got those injuries. Everyone was silent. The doctor cleared his throat and continued his explanation.

"But don't worry, He's stable now. But don't disturb him too much, his recovery is very slow. If you want to see him, I'll only let two person to enter."

"Thank you, doctor." Arshtat said. With that, the doctor returned to the infirmary.

Both of his parents were the first to enter the room, it was very quiet. Faroush laid on the bed with a white blanket covering his body. He looked over his guests with tired icy blue eyes.

"Oh,your majesty…"

"Shh…don't talk too much, son." Ferid sat on the side of the bed gently brushed his son's silver hair to the side. Arshtat sat down on the chair next to her son's bed and stroke his cold and pale cheek. "Oh dear, I'm sorry, Faroush."

The injured one stirred a bit, completely exhausted. With all strength remain he forced his consciousness to stay. "What for …your majesty?"

"I'm sorry for pushing you too hard and…" Ferid's words were cut off by his wife's sudden sobs. "Faroush dear, I'm sorry we haven't been paying attention on you. You must have felt abandoned and unloved right? I'm sorry that we've always been preoccupied with Lym and forget that you also need attention too. I even blamed and slapped you yesterday."

With all his strength left, Faroush tried hard to grab his mother's hand and felt the warmth emanating from it. The warmth he needed.

"It's okay mom…no one's…perfect. I can understand that….you're very busy.."

"But we should still make you our priority! You're our son. We love you so much." Ferid said.

Faroush closed his eyes for a while, gathering strength to communicate with his parents. Even breathing was very hard for him right now.

"Father, Mother…have you ever…regret of….having me as … your child? For not…being able to inherit…the throne?"

"Shh, don't say that ever again, son. I'm gonna be mad at you if you ever mention it again. Of course we didn't. We're always proud of you. Never even once we ever regretted having you as our kid. Both you and Lym are the most important thing to us." Ferid squeezed his son's hand harder, assuring him he was telling the truth. He watched his son slowly closed his tired eyes, a smile could be seen on his face.

"I'm ….glad I wasn't….a burden…"

"Oh, you should know how much all of us love you, my son." Arshtat hugged the sleeping form of his son gently. "Now sleep well, Faroush." With that he drifted off to sleep.

The End.

Phew that one was very tiring. At first I wanted to write " for not being a girl instead of a boy" then I changed my mind coz that sounds so… er…you know what I mean. Anyway, that's my one-shot, sorry for mistypes or grammar mistakes within thestory. I would be gladly to receive any kind of comment or critics (not flame) to improve my writing skill. Thank you for reading :)

Ps: if there's anyone who wants me to translate it in Indonesian, I'll translate it for you, just tell me okay?


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